It’s time for Kpopalypse roundup! Let’s take a look at some new releases!
Jung Kook feat. Jack Harlow – 3D
Certainly better than the boring crap V has been throwing out there lately, because at least this has a pulse. Who invited the homeless guy though.
ITZY – Ringo
Not a song about the only talented member of The Beatles, but just the usual generic Latin thing.
ONEUS – Baila Conmigo
Billlie – BYOB (bring your best friend)
There’s a letter missing from that acronym and there’s also something seriously missing from the music.
XG – Puppet Show
Apparently incels are sad about this song because of the lyrics or whatever which is weird. People have been shitting on women in songs for centuries so it’s only fair that women get to clap back, I’m just sad that it’s not a very good song. Great looking video though.
Wonho – I just
I just wish this song was better, or Wonho got his shirt off.
BewhY – Holy Toast
The rap parts of this aren’t too bad but when he switches on the Autotune all my belief in god is flushed down the drain.
Dawn – Heart
He’s back in the tunnel with fire but no smoke, and probably the best song he’s ever had, but that’s not saying a lot.
Dawn feat. Gemini – Seasons
This other song sucks, like a lot of stuff this week. It’s a slow week because of Chuseok apparently, and it’s sure showing here.
Zior Park – Queen
What is actually going on here, does anybody know.
Kwangmin feat. Yook Sungjae – Mayday
Why do Korean MV directors think bunny masks look good and not creepy.
Mark Tuan – Your World
My world got just a little bit more shit when I listened to this.
SM Classics TOWN Orchestra – Golden Age (Orchestra ver.)
Ahahahaha what garbage. Just give up on the orchestral thing, SM. You’re just making fools of yourselves.
Girl’s World – Fly High (Thumbelina)
The song’s actually alright, but for some reason the girls are being made to sing at the ultra-childlike end of their register and it kind of puts a damper on things. It’s not cute, it just sounds offputting.
BABY BLUE – I’m not even drunk
I’m not drunk either, but listening to this boring sit-down ballad sure makes me want to start getting hammered as soon as possible.
F.CUZ – Shine
You’re not interested in this awful new version of some awful ballad that sucked the first time around and still sucks now, and neither am I, so let’s instead have our weekly black music feature! This week’s selection is Pleasure Venom and damn are they good. I don’t know very much about this group but I do know that their punk rock music hits like a fucking steamroller and they’re criminally underplayed and need a lot more attention than they’re getting. Hopefully having them here in this post helps some way towards that.
U Sung Eun – Star
This is the girl who does the vocals for Apoki. Look at her, and how pretty she is. For some reason someone felt that we had to watch the ugliest computer avatar in the existence of Asian pop music instead. There is no justice.
Rad Museum feat. BE’O – Call Me Back
I’m definitely leaving these guys on read.
The Deep – Bappi
Nice visual style, but not much happening here of interest musically, just some generic dance thing.
Touched – Night View
Average song, but the extra points for the microphone use definitely edge it towards the better stuff for this week.
HotSauce feat. Deepshower & Laveen – IDWLU
I just like it that there’s a guy in the Korean music scene called “Deepshower”. Definitely no hip-hop to be found here.
MRCH – Surrender
This reminds me of those live videos where the band stand right at the far wall of a huge room, except they didn’t have the money for the room or a wireless microphone so they just pushed her as far forward away from the band as the budget allowed.
Woojae – Starland
Terrible microphone use here. I have to stop roundup her because I am so offended.
BONUS RANDOM VIDEOS OF THE WEEK
halinA – Dreamcatcher – Deja Vu – violin cover
A thousand, million times better than the total insulting fucking botched disaster for fuckwits that is most of SM’s “orchestral” remixes.
Bibi – Free hugs!
Who can say no? Look at all the guys with their timid “hover hands” hugging Bibi very respectfully. It warms the heart.
TVXQ ft. BoA & TRAX – Tri-angle
The grandfathers of pointless change-ups in songs, TVXQ that five-member group from SM Entertainment get together with BoA and TRAX who both pretty much add nothing interesting except some weird diversions that don’t quite fit. It’s actually the orchestration that’s the star of the show here, which makes me wonder how SM is getting it so damn wrong in their “town orchestra” project.
That’s all for this week! Kpopalypse roundup returns next week! In the meantime don’t forget that the latest Kpopalypse survey is now LIVE so CLICK HERE and take the survey while you can! Also don’t forget the bonus round! Thanks, caonimas!