The U.S. Military’s Defense Advanced Research Project Agency (DARPA) was forced to perform an emergency shutdown of their experimental combat-focused AI program after it attempted to weaponize former Cannibal Corpse and current Six Feet Under vocalist Chris Barnes’ pig squeals into a lethal sound beam. Had the AI program successfully executed this plan for a terrifying new weapons system, experts theorize it could have resulted in a global extinction-level event.
An experienced combat trauma surgeon who was willing to speak off the record explained that humans aren’t equipped physiologically to process these kinds of high-intensity, abrasive sounds, and even limited exposure could cause brain damage, organ failure, erectile dysfunction, Pygmalionism and the condition known as Hammer Smashed Ear Canal Syndrome.
Upon learning that his vocals were being used in a top-secret weapons program without his knowledge or legal consent, Chris Barnes remarked, “This should end the fucking debate over who’s the better Cannibal Corpse vocalist, right? Fuck yeah, eat it Corpsefisher! EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!”
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